FIVE SCANDALOUS PARTY IDEAS
Last weekend some of New York City’s most well known Love, Sex and Dating Bloggers converged on my New York City living room for a fun and sexy feast. We didn’t need much prompting for over-sharing but amongst the things I learned is that there’s an oral sex move called “The Slap Happy.” Oh my! Don’t you wish that you knew what that was? Keep reading.
A civilian buddy saw pics of the Sinner’s Dinner as we call our nights out and asked, “What was the occasion?” She assumed that it must have been someone’s birthday.
What’s the occasion? Well, I dunno. Fall Equinox? Why do we feel like we need permission to have a good time?
Here are 5 scandalous and sinful parties and the accessories you need for your soiree. I have personally thrown each of these parties several times and I promise you a good time. There are no orgies or marriage swaps included, but go for it if that’s your thing. We are a judgment free zone. Unless of course you’re talking about the Real Housewives.
5 Sexy Party Ideas Guaranteed to Leave ‘Em Talking
1) Ding Dong the Divorce is Done!
I threw a Divorce Party a few years ago for a friend whose beloved turned out to be a deceptive ass. Yep. It happens. The party was the perfect cure to set her off on her new life with fun and positive energy.
A sex toy educator was the main attraction. She came in with a sassy bag of tricks and potions that would make Ringling Brothers gag. Depending on the divorce situation you may even want to hold a mock funeral and “bury” the marriage.
One of my favorite toys for a divorce party is the (a) Willy Wack It, a giant penis piñata. Let the guest of honor get first wack and go for it. Of course beating up the willy only works if the person you’re throwing the party for is breaking up with a man. Additional party helpers might be the deck of (b) 52 Sex Positions Flash Cards to get people talking or the (c) Cock Toss, a self explanatory ring toss game.
ake plenty of pictures but don’t tag of facebook without clearance. Who knows whose boss is watching.
2) Coming Out Party.
Turn up the Diana Ross song and sing, “I’m Coming Out!” If you’re gay and you know it clap your hands. Your coming out is definitely a reason to celebrate.
Never been in the closet? You can still have a coming out. Just ask any deb. I like boys and I wanted to have a coming out party just to assert being empowered and finally feeling comfortable in my skin. Yeah! But most people coming out will still be escaping the tired closet. Good for you.
Suggestions for a Coming Out of the Closet Party - of course adjust orientations as necessary: (a) Pin the Macho (Penis) on the Man, (b) Pillow Fight Lesbian Comic Book, (c) Lesbian Sex Card Game, (d) Male Nude Playing Cards, and depending on how freaky you want to take it, good old (e) Dirty Dice, the modern version of Twister.
3) Sinner’s Dinner.
A Sinner’s Dinner is Girl’s and Boy’s Night In. Delicious food, excellent company, good music and tasty drinks. This is the oh-so-fun shindig I had with my sexy love and sex blogger buddies. Our dinner was a potluck (each one bring something) and only lacking in red velvet cupcakes.
I can’t lend you my sexy friends but some supplies that will help your Sinner’s Dinner get off the ground include: (a) Pecker Cake Pan & Cupcake Tray, Pecker Candy Dish & Pecker Party Tray. Then you need (b) Penis Pasta if you really want to make everyone blush. You make get really silly and buy a bunch of fake strippers aka (c) blow up dolls to decorate your place. Don’t forget the (d) Who’s the Biggest Pervert Game? I know, I know.
4) Single and Fabulous.
Earlier this year Vienna of ABC’s The Bachelor fame threw a post-Jake Single and Fabulous Party to celebrate her new douchebag free existence. I suggest you do the same. If you can get to a strip club or a pole dancing class then definitely go for it. If not, you may want to set up your own strip club at home. A prohibition themed burlesque party might be fun.
You’ll need (a) feather boas, (b) the Carmen Electra Pole Dancing Kit, (c) Art of Pole Dancing book or (d) Erotic Pole Dancing DVD, and why not include (e) a Vinyl Break Away Skirt for good measure. You’re free, single and loving life. The world is your oyster. Go for it!
5) Bachelor and Bachelorette Parties
Yeah, yeah. The famous final fling before the ring. We had to include the standard oldie but goodie stag party because this is the only time the average person feels they have permission to let loose.
Birthday parties are fun but traditionally a bachelor or bachelorette party is all balls out, pun intended. Nonetheless, bachelorette parties I’ve attended often seem lame, as if there’s a last chance air of desperation to them. Whether we ordered the male strippers in or visited Chippendales I couldn’t help feeling that most male strippers are probably more interested in the groom. Yikes!
At any rate, fun additions to your bachelorette party soiree might be a (a) Girl’s Last Night Out Survival Kit and (b) the Lipsdick is a great and inexpensive party favor. And what do you mean Last Night Out? Don’t let your marriage be a funeral.
You may not have the budget that Katy Perry and Rihanna did to celebrate in Las Vegas but you can still have a fab time. We wish you many decadent soirees. Life is too short to live a meager existence. Every time you open your eyes is a reason to celebrate. Celebrate life and life will celebrate you. No more shrinking or apologizing for your existence. Let’s party!
Abiola of AbiolaTV.com is a popular Media Personality, Author and Lifestyle Journalist. Her blogs, web TV series and advice on living more passionately are syndicated web-wide.